Transcription

Today, I have something super special for you. Have you ever felt that pull, that inner drive telling you there’s more to life, more to who you are, and more to what you can achieve? Too often, we find ourselves waiting for that perfect moment—the right circumstances or the green light to step into who we are meant to be. But what if the urgency is now? What if the time to become your true self is today?

Joining me is someone who truly embodies this message. Tina Womack Hucks, from collegiate athlete to educator to online entrepreneur, has constantly reinvented herself while staying fiercely committed to her purpose. She’s not just a best-selling author; she’s a living example of eliminating excuses and living your best life right here, right now. So get ready for some real talk on stepping into your purpose and living with urgency. Welcome to the show, Tina!

Thank you so much. I’ve looked forward to this day. I’m so glad that I’m going to have an opportunity to really get this message out because it’s something I’m super passionate about. It’s part of me, it’s part of my heart, especially in the last couple of years. So here we go, glad to be here.

Thank you. So we found Tina on LinkedIn, and I remember my teammate saying, “She’s a fabulous woman, we really have to interview her.” I’m like, “All right, send me her information.” When I saw it, I fell in love with her presence and the work she’s doing, and I wanted to bring her to the show. Tina, I know you have had quite the journey from being an athlete to an educator and now an entrepreneur. Share with us what made you become an entrepreneur in the first place?

Oh, you know, I think life. Honestly, I found myself making some really big changes. I had gone through a divorce, lived the single mom life for a couple of years, and fallen into a relationship—when I say “fallen,” it happened completely by accident. But I found myself in a whole different place in life, and I knew I wanted life to look and feel really different, especially stepping into a new relationship, and seeing that my children were growing up—they weren’t babies anymore, they were in middle school and high school. I knew that in the weeks and years to come, life was going to automatically look different. So I wanted to do everything I could to get to a place where I was really happy in all areas of my life, because it was important to me to be the wife, the mother that was happy with myself, my life, and where everything was going. So I stepped away from a career and stepped into an online business. Looking back, there are zero regrets. I went through a lot of change, a lot of falling down, and eventually, I got to where I wanted to be. Everything just showed its purpose—the mistakes, the falls, the getting back up, all of it.

That is so cool. So you figured out that you shouldn’t be in this marriage, you figured out this career is not for you, and then you literally created a path to become the entrepreneur that you are today. I’m sure there were a lot of moments where you felt like, “Damn, am I even doing the right thing?” Did you have those moments?

Oh my goodness. Yes, and I’m glad you’re bringing this up because from the outside world, those people looking at my life would never have known there was anything wrong with my marriage. They would never have thought I would want to leave the profession of educator, but I knew, and it was very, very hard to make those initial decisions. It wasn’t instant. I went through years in my marriage where I wondered what I should do, and I ended up doing what other people thought I should do. So I can’t say that this was a decision that just came to me immediately and I jumped with it. It took me years to get to the place where I was confident enough to say, “I’m not happy. This is not how I want my life to look. I am not benefiting anyone by staying.” So let me get out, let me walk away, and let me do it as genuinely and as peacefully as possible—but do it, make the decision. And the same thing with my profession. I was a teacher for 20 years and, not to pat myself on the back, but I was a very good teacher. I loved the children, I loved what the profession meant in those children’s lives and families’ lives, but I was getting to a place where I wasn’t really happy with the system and where it was going anymore. Quite honestly, I wanted location freedom in a brand new relationship. I wanted days where I could go to lunch with my husband if I wanted to—those little life moments that I couldn’t have where I was. I was bringing work home more and more every single day, and that didn’t look or sound pretty, and I was becoming a person that wasn’t even happy with myself. When you really start hearing yourself, that’s when you know, “OK, this is getting bad,” and that’s where I found myself. I had to jerk myself up and say, “Tina, are you going to continue to do this—this thing that you don’t want, this person that you aren’t even—or are you going to change?” And that required a decision. I made that decision when I got to year 20; I decided it’s time, and so I moved out of the profession.

Now, you talk about being an entrepreneur. I knew that—well, let me back up. When I was going through my divorce, that’s when I jumped into the online world of business because I had everything I needed, right? I had my phone, I had WiFi, all the little things that you need to build an online business. I could do it while I was teaching, and I knew that I was going to need financial support. Fast forward a few years, and now I’m in a brand new relationship, and I continued with entrepreneurship because I knew that I wanted my days to look different. I wanted location freedom, time freedom. I wanted more control over my daily schedule, my calendar, and what life looked like. I continued with the online business, and two years into that, I was able to walk away. That’s what also helped me walk away from the profession of teaching because I did have that financial support.

And when did you really start thinking, “All right, I’m a teacher. This is not working for me. I’m bringing in a lot of work, my children are home, my family is home, but it’s like you’re bringing your school to your home and you haven’t left work.” How was that for you when you would bring stuff home and your children or someone else needed your time?

Oh, you know, there were a range of emotions, right? And look, some days were good, but a lot of the days were negative or didn’t feel good or were pressure-filled or felt like a weight. When I started recognizing that pattern—and maybe it took someone brand new in my life, my husband, who had only been in that teacher world with me for a couple of years—to say, “You don’t seem too happy.” He would bring up things, and we would have a lot of conversations where I realized, “Gosh, I’m not a negative person, but I am really a negative person these days.” That’s when I really started to think, “I need an exit plan. This can’t continue.” I also started giving more time to my family, putting some responsibilities on other people, not spending the time at home and on weekends as I had for over 17, 18 years of teaching. I started seeing that my classroom performance wasn’t what my standards had always been, and that’s not fair to the children. I just started recognizing in a whole lot of ways, “This is not good, and it’s on me to make a change.”

How long ago was this when you decided to make a change?

It took me a couple of years to actually walk away, lock the door for the last time, and that was in 2019.

Wow, like during COVID.

Yes, right before all of that happened. Thank God. And I think that’s a God thing because I’m not extremely flexible. I like some fences; I like knowing what’s going on. Those educators had to be so incredibly flexible, and it was a God thing. He knew it was time for Tina to step away.

So then you’re like, “All right, bye-bye schooling. Now I’m going to go into my own world.” What was the first step? I know you said the first step is deciding; we have to decide in our head that this is it, this is not serving me anymore. So you took that decision, then what did you do to get to where you are today, where you have the freedom of location, time, and are no longer with the person you thought you’d spend the rest of your life with? You look happy and confident in your ability. So what else did you do?

I worked my online business for two years while I was working full-time. When I stepped away from teaching and stepped into online business ownership full-time, it took me some time to figure out what my day needed to look like, what my goals were, and what I wanted to accomplish. I had to get very clear on my purpose. Now that I was no longer an educator affecting little lives, how did I want to affect the people, the adults, in my life? I had to get clear on how to make that happen with action steps, a daily schedule, and a plan of action. Going from a job to working from home feels very different, with so many more distractions throughout the day—the laundry, house chores, people showing up at your door. So you have to create a clear schedule to accomplish anything. I’m a personality that goes 110%, so once I make a decision, I know I want to succeed here; I want it

to be what it’s supposed to be, and that’s on me again. So what am I going to do? I’m giving 110%.

And what was that you decided to do? I’m very curious.

I wanted a business that mattered. I wanted to reach as many people as possible, hit financial ranks, and achieve milestones within the company that would open other doors for me, like speaking and leadership on another level. It took me a while; it wasn’t as quick as I initially thought, especially when I was able to do it full-time. I thought, “Once I step into full-time, this thing will just unroll, and it’s going to be fantastic.” That’s not what happened. I know now, looking back, that it was because I had a lot to learn. Stepping away from one profession into another doesn’t mean success to success. I started at ground zero with an online business. My expectations were lofty, but those lofty goals kept me pushing. Eventually, I realized it didn’t matter the timeframe—just keep doing the work, take the focus off of “me,” and think about the people you’re serving. Let it play out as it should.

And in the downtime—because there were downtimes, times when I thought, “Holy crap, what did I do?”—those moments came often. That’s part of being an entrepreneur and making big life decisions. But I learned that downtime is the time to learn and get better at my craft. You take those uptimes and run with them, so it all works out.

Totally. And what about when you’re in that downtime, when you can’t see the path forward and feel stuck? Women who want to go from place A to place B can get stuck in their heads, creating excuses that can last for years. Were there certain excuses you were telling yourself over and over?

Absolutely. And one of them, which is a fear for a lot of women I speak to and those who start a business with me, is the fear of other people’s opinions and the fear of social media. That’s our livelihood; we started an online business, so our online presence must be consistent, powerful, and meaningful. Yet it’s so easy to compare. There are people who have created beautiful spaces online and others who feel like they’re spinning their wheels and going nowhere. I found myself often feeling like I was doing all the things but getting nowhere. When you feel like you’re getting nowhere, you start reflecting. Self-reflection is positive, but when it turns into self-demeaning thoughts and negativity, it becomes damaging. I’ve realized how crucial it is to understand what we tell ourselves. I can’t say I was always aware of what I was telling myself, nor did I realize the impact of negative self-talk. But in the last couple of years, I’ve made significant personal growth and gotten passionate about my message. It all starts with awareness—of our actions and what we say to ourselves—and being honest with ourselves.

So you’re talking about negative self-talk, which is important to be aware of, especially when we want to be authentic, live our best lives, and live with urgency today. What about living in the present moment? So many women don’t understand the concept of urgency; they think, “Oh, when I lose 10 pounds, I’ll go on a date,” or, “When my business makes $100,000, I’ll take a vacation.” Can you tell us about the concept of urgency?

Urgency, for me, slapped me in the face a couple of years ago because something tragic occurred in my life. I hate that it often takes an illness or a tragedy to really stop us in our tracks. For me, it was losing my sister. She was 18 months older than me and a very strong, passionate, talented person who sadly allowed a lot of people to control what she did. She was sensitive to opinions, her children, and put her life on hold. Then, at 52, she was diagnosed with cancer. You never think it will happen to you or your immediate loved ones until it does. She initially intended to beat it, and she did everything she could for about a year and a half, but in the last months, she felt defeated. Watching her—a person with so many gifts and talents who put her life on hold—face that reality was life-changing.

We know we have one life, a beginning, and an end, but I don’t know that enough of us pay attention to the fact that when we wake up, we’re given another chance to do whatever we are meant to do. I believe every person has a meaningful path they are meant to follow, but many of us don’t get there. We take time for granted, get lost in the busyness of life, and being busy isn’t always productive. My passion has only intensified since losing my sister because I saw her let time slip by, taking only baby steps toward her dreams. Then her life ended, and the truth is we don’t know how much time we have. The urgency is figuring out what we are passionate about, our skills and talents, our gifts, and what we want to give to others—now.

And I’ve heard, “What if you were to meet the person you were supposed to become at the end of your time, and you didn’t become that person?” Most of us would say, “God, yes, I’d regret it.” So, every day, I remind myself to take a new day as an opportunity to get closer to who I am meant to be. It’s not always easy or clear, but that’s what we should tell ourselves daily. Am I getting closer to the person I’m meant to be?

I love how you said that. Years of teaching yoga and meditation have taught me the concept of living in the moment—the present moment as a gift in your life. When you understand that deeply, it changes your relationships. The person you are hugging today might not be there tomorrow. Most people only realize this when someone leaves them, dies, or there’s a separation or divorce. But urgency shouldn’t come only after losing someone. The urgency should come today because if you’re not feeling good waking up every day, what’s the point? There’s no guarantee you’ll wake up tomorrow.

Exactly. So tell us, Tina, after your sister passed away—I’m so sorry to hear that, and I lost my dad in 2021, which also taught me a similar message—what steps can you share with women who know they’re in bad marriages or domestically violent relationships but can’t seem to leave? What are three simple steps they can take to visualize a better life?

This one’s tough because I have people in my own life who I’ve counseled repeatedly, and it’s constant—they come back with the same problem every year. It’s almost as if they know the answers but don’t move because of fear. To get past fear, you have to take action somewhere. You only gain confidence through action. Doing something you’re afraid of helps you see that you can get through it, and it’s a confidence builder.

I’d also advise women to stop talking to many people about their situation. Find one confidant you trust wholeheartedly and let go of the rest of the conversations because having multiple discussions keeps you in a perpetual state of thinking about what is rather than what could be. And here’s something crucial: what we think about is what we get more of. Lately, I’ve been diving deep into manifestation, visualization, and the law of attraction. Too many people think about what is, rather than stepping into the “what ifs.” If you keep thinking about how bad your marriage is, how you’ll never get out, or how no one will want you, guess what? That’s what will keep happening.

So be aware of your thoughts. If you find yourself saying, “I can’t, I won’t, I hope,” change it. “Hope” means you don’t believe you can but wish you could—that’s not the right way to think. Start thinking about the future and what you want to happen. Affirm to yourself, “I am confident, strong, able to provide for myself, and independent. My life will look exactly how I want it to. I am attracting positive energy.” Change your thought processes and be honest with yourself. How many friends can tell you to do something if you’re not ready to do it? It doesn’t matter how many of us say, “Yes, you can”—you have to get to a place where you’re willing to step away and say, “I’m going to do it.”

And I agree. When you start talking that way, your mind might not initially accept it; you’ll still have fears and negative thoughts. But over time, repeating these positive thoughts will lead you to act in alignment with them.

What about women who have envisioned an amazing future life but are still stuck in their current “what is”? They know what they want but can’t seem to take action.

For me, in those years of deciding whether to stay or leave, I knew finances would be difficult, so I started planning. Fear only goes away when you act, and actions bring courage. If someone has accepted they don’t want what they currently have but doesn’t know how to get out, I’d suggest going to a professional who can help lay out all the pieces and find a starting point. Thankfully, I’m able to compartmentalize well and focus, so I had to focus on what I could do today to get closer to walking away. And it’s different for everyone, but at the end of the day, it takes putting one foot in front of the other, making a small step toward where you want to be rather than where you are.

At a certain point, you have to be willing to knock yourself around a little and say, “What do I truly want?” Then take the actions to get there.

I love that. I want to add that last six months have been difficult for me, and I’ve been waking up late and sleeping early—stuck in my head. I was diagnosed with adenomyosis, and questions like “What will I do with my business and my work?” kept coming up.

One day, I decided I needed to get out of that state of mind. So I meditated, and the message that came was to wake up early again. Sometimes, you don’t know what that one action will be, but you have to trust it. For me, it was waking up at 4:30 a.m. again. I had no alarm but trusted my spirit, and the next morning, I woke up at exactly 4:30. One action can change your state of mind.

Yes! I’m glad you brought up something so simple because a lot of people think they need grand gestures to make change when it’s the small decisions that matter. Deciding to listen to something positive before sleep can make a difference.

And when you start making decisions, the decision-making process becomes easier. It doesn’t matter if a decision is right or wrong; it will still lead to the next decision and open doors you never knew existed. So don’t stress about “What if it’s wrong?”—just make a decision.

I love that. So far, Tina has told us to become aware of what’s going on in your mind, listen to those negative thoughts, and change them into something positive. You’ve mentioned the sense of urgency—knowing you don’t have all the time in the world. And now you’re saying to make that decision and take the next step, even if it takes 10 more steps.

As we wrap up, Tina, do you have any last words of wisdom for women who need to become their authentic selves and live life with urgency?

The most important thing is to listen to that little silent voice inside your head—it tells you what your heart wants. Quiet and stillness are so crucial, especially today. Find moments to be still and listen to yourself. Whether you meditate or practice yoga, it’s important to get to know you. Women often get propelled into careers or motherhood, losing themselves in the process. Then suddenly, they find themselves not recognizing who they are. Understand your passions, your gifts, your purpose, and make decisions from those places. That’s how you find meaning and live the life you’re meant for.

Thank you so much, Tina. This was a beautiful conversation. Where can our listeners find you?

Thank you for having me! You can find me on Facebook and LinkedIn under “Tina Womack Hucks,” and on X (formerly Twitter), where I follow sports. I’d love to connect with anyone who resonates with this message or just wants to have more conversations.

Perfect. We’ll add her links in our show notes. Thank you so much, Tina. To our listeners, always remember: metamorphosis, not medication. Namaste! If you have any questions or want answers, book a 20-minute free consultation with me. And if you loved this episode, please leave a review on iTunes. Thank you, and see you in the next episode!